If you’ve ever heard these words, from either an ex or a family member, it’s like a knife to the heart! But when I look back at past relationships I realise that this was actually the BEST thing anyone ever said to me (not because I only remember the “good times”) because it made me realise that if my happiness and self worth relied on someones opinion of me then I would never feel REALLY happy.
People think being alone on Valentines Day is the most depressing feeling in the world but trying to hold your boyfriends hand as you walk down the street only for him to shrug you off can make you feel just as empty and alone.
It wasn’t until I started reading about self development that I discovered how people treat you has absolutely NOTHING to do with you, they are projecting the shitty feelings they have about themselves onto you.
You do not have to accept their behaviour but you do have to teach them how to treat you. But that can be difficult if you already feel unloved, not good enough or even invisible, because you’re going to be comfortable with someone who also treats you
“You accept the love you think you deserve.” ~ Perks of a Wallflower.
When you’re in a loveless relationship it can feel like you’re in a dark hole that you have no way of climbing out of but when you decide that you truly deserve better and ensure your actions match your words you start to feel a little brighter.
People take their lead from you and if you treat yourself with love and respect then
you let them know the standard of behaviour you will accept from them. This sounds simple but how the hell do you make yourself feel good and loved when you feel like shit?
You put on your big girl pants and you force yourself.
Why? Because not shaving your legs and living in your boggin’ onesie isn’t helping make you feel any better, so start investing in yourself.
Buy a new lipstick. Treat yourself to a luxury bath foam. Shave your legs or book a waxing appointment (not in case you get lucky but because it will make you feel better). Light a scented candle (the smell of orange is a natural mood lifter). Cook yourself your favourite meal. Buy an expensive body lotion. Organise a girls night out. Organise a girls night in.
Do ANYTHING that is fun or makes you feel good and it will become second nature. Stop waiting for someone to buy you flowers, buy them yourself!
You might still be in the mindset that it’s someone else’s job to make you feel loved,
you might be thinking “why should I”? Because making you feel special is YOUR responsibility and you deserve to feel this way!
Make this Valentines Day one to remember!
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